By: Anne Marie Holloway
As the mother of four children, I often find myself smack dab in the middle of a “mayhem” I never thought could happen! I remember one harrowing and comical morning in particular where just finding a pair of pants for myself to wear was almost impossible.
I thought I would share the dialogue with you that I wrote down in my journal over four years ago. I hope you find some comic relief in this post! Hang in there my fellow cape-wearing, endlessly-multitasking, energy-zapped super Momma friends. I am told it gets easier!?!
Here is the conversation:
My six year old stops in the doorway wearing his Superman Cape and carrying a green cup and says:
“Hey Mom, where are your pants?”
Me: (While standing in front of the dryer wearing an oversized ratty T-shirt while rustling through a dryer load of laundry) “I’m looking for a clean pair!”
Son: “Mom, you can’t just wear Dad’s pants?”
Me: (Muffled voice from within the dryer) “Nah, Dad’s pants would not fit me.”
Son: “Ahh..Mom? I just spilled the apple juice!!”
Me: (As I look to see the 1/2 gallon of juice on its side and continue to pour onto floor) “Oh jeez bud, I’m trying to get on my pants, I told you to wait and I would pour you some juice.”
Son: “But I asked you for some juice a long time ago!”
(Enter 3-year-old daughter, running through kitchen and who proceeds to slip on said spilled apple juice.)
Me: (Bumping my head on the top of the dryer as I attempt to run into the kitchen to save the day – still not wearing pants.) “Oh no!”
Son: (A judgment filled expression covers his little face) “Mom, why aren’t you wearing any pants?”
Me: (Huge sigh) “I don’t know kiddo…”
Son: (Satisfied Shrug as he puts his super cape over my shoulders – trying to help) “You’re silly Momma.” (Insert a slight hesitant pause here) “Hey, Mom?”
Me: (Sitting on the kitchen floor, wearing a red superman cape over my T-shirt, while simultaneously sporting a magnificent headache and hugging an apple juice covered sobbing toddler) “Yes, bud?”
Son: “Think you can get me some more juice now?”
Me: (Exacerbated) “Your sister hurt herself, there is apple juice currently all over the floor and I’m STILL not wearing any pants!”
Son: (With an optimistic tone to his voice) “Um, well you have my Super Cape! And when Sister stops crying, we clean up, and you FINALLY put on your pants – Maybe then you could pour me some more juice!?”
Me: In the middle of the kitchen half dressed and holding an inconsolable toddler… looks blankly at first born son and blinks. (Insert cricket sound here)
Son: “Hey Mom?!”
Mom: (Slightly defeated – and not quite sure what to do next) “Yes?”
Son: (Huge relieved smile spread from ear to ear) “Hey! I found your pants!!”
I look behind me only to find my fourth and youngest child (the 15 month old) wiping up the spilled apple juice with my only clean pair of jeans..
Yep. Just another day in the life of a Mom.
Now, where is that super-suit?