Mommy Time

By: Tanya Pimental

At thirty-two years old, there are days were I feel like a true grown up.  My life has been full of amazing things and yet not without my share of heartache. And yet still, there are many days I don’t feel old enough to be married for nearly eight years, living in our first home with a third child on the way.  In these years, I have worn many hats, but the main hat in my rotation these days is the mom hat.  I truly love wearing it and think it suits me well, but there are times when it must come off and learning this as a new mom is key.  Giving yourself “Mommy Time” will make you a better mom, wife, and friend.

One of the hardest things to do as a mom is to take time away from your family for you.  What will others think if I skip bedtime and go for a drive? Will everyone be ok if I throw mac and cheese on the table and go join my girlfriends for dinner?  Well, others will wish they were you driving with the radio blasting something other than Kids Bop and they will envy your warm plate of food that your family would never eat if you made at home. We forget how to be selfish when we give birth.

A few nights a month, I make it a point to make dinner plans with other mom friends. I rush out the door the second my husband comes home and I don’t think twice about how the kids will do at bedtime.  That was not always the case of course.  The first few times you go out, you’ll text home 5 or 6 times checking in and you’ll head home right after your meal without dessert.  But then after a while you realize how nice it is to sit and chat and eat with two hands.  You’ll stay out far too late inevitably talking about your sweet sleeping cherubs, but no longer worried that they will survive the evening without you.

Even something at home, like blogging or reading can rejuvenate you.  I have loved blogging about our family and my life as a mom.  It makes me feel like I am “journaling” and yet like I am maybe connecting with others that are on a similar journey. You don’t have to have a blog full of followers.  The simple act of sharing a story can often times be enough to destress. Make a cup of coffee or tea and write.  Heck, pour a glass of wine and really enjoy the time to yourself.

In the last year, I have started running.  I find it to be the perfect mom sport.  Taking time to exercise in any way is both great for your physical health, but wonderful for your mental health as well.  The great thing about running is that it is quiet.  It’s as much time as I am able to take away with only my moving feet and my mind.  I always feel rejuvenated after a half hour or so out alone.  And when you are ready to run your first race it will seem daunting, but then you will feel so accomplished in the end.  I didn’t realize just how much I missed achieving something in the few years I have been a mom, but really this mom thing is often under praised that we forget just how awesome we are day-to-day.  A little reminder is always nice to lift the spirits.

We don’t all have the time or money to slip away for a spa day, but if you can, make sure to get at least a seasonal pedicure/manicure.  Save up a few dollars here and there, and treat yourself to a massage.  And if you can’t get away, close the bathroom door and shower without someone hanging over the side of the tub asking for fruit snacks.  It’s all about making time for you and when you do, you’ll realize you are a better mom for doing it a few times a month.

3 thoughts on “Mommy Time

  1. Mom time? Me time? Huh? It’s been a while and I forget what it is… Actually, I cannot say that. My husband took care of the kids for a good part of a recent Saturday so I could do an organizing and cleaning task that had become impossible with little ones underfoot and, occasionally, when I am at my mom’s, she tells me to go jump in the shower while she watches my kids. Weird? No way! A shower without worrying over my little ones or having them in with me is such a treat.

    If anyone ever told me 7 years ago that I wold relish time to take a shower or to clean above many other ways to use “free” time, I would have laughed. Mom-perspective changes many things!

    Enjoy your runs, dinners, blogging and moments of recharging YOU!

  2. I had a friend who worked with me once whose children (twins) attended a daycare right next to our office. However, she would go home everyday for less than 20 minutes, then come back and pick them up. When I asked her why she didn’t just take them when she left? She told me that was the only time she could go to the bathroom without someone banging on the door, yelling “mama”, and watching those little fingers come under the door like tentacles! I laughed so hard because I totally understood what she was saying!! I agree that Mommy Time is good for the whole family.

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